Your sh*tty horoscope this month:
You might be out of breath with all that happened in September, Stikit. But real talk - October isn’t slowing down. If anything October winds are picking things up for you. The start of the month brings many exciting new activities, try picking up yoga around the 6th and you might get more out of it than just a good stretch. On the 8th, the moon will shift to pluto, activating some of your more childlike tendencies. Explore these feelings - you never know, they might lead you to the purrrfect place. In the second half of the month, you might be picked to win something special...cross your fingers and submit to the universe for the best outcome. As the month winds down, things might start to get a little spooky. If you’re feeling rushed, turn to your friends for a little inspiration...
About STIK's Sh*tty Horoscope Series
Here’s the deal - we love astrology at Sh*t That I Knit. Sun signs, moon signs, ascendants - we are here for all of it. We don’t take it too seriously, but anything that can predict what the future holds is good in our book. And if that means we need to type in our birthday, birth time, and birth city into 5 different chart readers and 14 different horoscope websites to know exactly when to launch new beanies and when not to (#mercuryisinretrograde), we’re in. We can’t explain what it is about knowing your sign and reading your horoscopes, but we love it. Some are awesome and accurate, some are vague and kind of outrageous, but all of them are fun to read, sometimes silly, and always a great way to procrastinate.
So in honor of our favorite pastime, we’ll be writing a monthly blog called Your Sh*tty Horoscope. We’ve discovered a new sign called Stikitarius - more details below! Who knows what you’ll find each month - maybe a few hints about what’s to come, maybe a bunch of vagaries that don’t mean sh*t to you. We shall see. But we should note, that we are not trained astrologists, so please don’t plan your life around what we have to say. Okay - happy reading!
The age of the pompomarius
Birthday: Between September 1 - August 31
Symbol: The Beanie
Element: Cold Weather
Ruling Planet: The Sun
Your Favorite Things: Snuggly warm commutes to work, fierce females, nice humans, ski mountains, a good skincare routine, the beach, fake plants, bright colors, sweaty workouts
Things you Hate: Tardiness, mean people, lack of effort, bad customer service, wearing the same RTR dress as your friends, taking life too seriously, being bad at stuff